Please Write a a Funny Clean Joke That You Could Tell Your Grandmother or Kids or Both
We all enjoy spending family time with our grandparents.
They love us and cherish us. They are really good confidantes, so you can share almost everything with them.
The saying, "there is no place like home except grandma's", is so true. They always make us feel at home whenever they are around. They take care of us as mothers do. They bless us with good luck and pray for our success. Their love for their grandkids is unconditional. To express our love and gratitude for our grandmothers, we have compiled a list of some amazingly funny grandma jokes to make her feel special and make her laugh.
For more interesting articles, check out 65+ Best History Puns That Never Get Old and Grandpa Jokes.
Funny Jokes For Grandparents
These grandma jokes will make you the star of the next family dinner. Here are some really funny jokes for your grandma.
1. Why did grandmother stop going to the gym? It was not working out.
2. Why was grandma in such a hurry while making pasta sauce for the dinner guests? It was already 8pm and she was running out of thyme.
3. How come grandmas are so good at learning different languages so quickly? They are always grandma-tically correct.
4. Have you heard about the grandma who recently went through brain surgery? She was reluctant at first but later changed her mind.
5. Have you seen the sweater my grandmother made me? It's pretty knit.
6. How did Grandma describe her cataract surgery? It was an eye-opening experience for her.
7. What did grandma do when she was feeling lonely? She bought some shares because she wanted company.
8. Why was grandma arrested for taking a picture? She was framed.
9. Why did grandma stay up all night? She wanted to see where the sun went. The next day, it dawned on her.
10. Why did grandma leave the job at the glue factory? She could not stick with it.
Jokes About Grandma
Jokes about grandmothers can be really funny. Here you will get a list of some of the funniest grandmother jokes.
11. Why did the grandma ask her grandson not to work at the candle factory? Because he will have to work even on wick-ends.
12. What happened after grandmother decided to become vegan? Every time I meet her, it feels like I never met her'bivore.
13. What did grandma say when the doctor told her, that he suspects her DNA was reversed? "And"?
14. Heard about the dinosaur-themed tea party at grandma's place? She asked me to get tea-rex.
15. What did the grandma say when her grandson asked a question about gravity? It is a pretty attractive field.
16. What did the grandma reply when her confused grandson asked her about cloning? She replied, "I don't know dear, and that will make two of us."
17. Why was the grandma not happy when her grandson took the job of an archaeologist? Because his career lay in ruins.
18. What changed grandma's opinion about heart transplants? She had a change of heart.
19. What did the grandmother say when her granddaughter asked her about her cat's condition? Grandma replied, "The cat is f-el-ine now."
20. What did grandma say about her career as a young girl? I worked at the shoe showroom, and then they gave me the boot.
Funny Jokes For Grandma
Crack these hilarious jokes before your grandma and make her laugh out loud. Here you will get some chucklesome jokes for grandmas.
21. What is the similarity between a grandmother and a website? You can't deny the cookies.
22. What kind of shoes does a grandma like? Grandma prefers slip-on overshoes, because why knot?
23. What happened when grandma accidentally dropped the basket of ironed laundry? We watched it all unfold.
24. What did grandmother say about grandpa's stair construction work? She said, "he had to work really hard. It was an up and down business."
25. How did grandma agree to get spine surgery? She told me, "It was holding me back for a really long time."
26. Why was grandma so fascinated by a reversible sweater she was knitting? She said, "I want to see how it turns out."
27. Did your grandma give you her bread recipe? Yes, we often trade recipes on a knead to know basis.
28. Why do grandmas hate stairs? They suspect them as they are always up to something.
29. What did I say to my grandma when she asked me to help her with an ark? I told her I Noah guy.
30. Why did grandma refuse to eat the German sausage? She fears the wurst.
Funny Jokes To Tell Your Grandma
These grandma jokes will get you all the attention you deserve in your family gatherings. Here we have prepared a list of funny jokes about grandma.
31. What happens when you forget to take off your lenses before a good night's sleep with grandma? Your dreams are really clear.
32. What happened when grandma decided to take action against the airline for losing her luggage? She lost her case.
33. How was grandmother's 92nd birthday party? It was an emotional moment for all of us, even the cake was in tiers.
34. What did grandmother suggest when the thermostat stopped working? Grandma told me to stand at the corner of the room, as they are always around 90 degrees.
35. Why was grandmother not able to go to the library? Because it was all booked.
36. What did grandma say every time she heard an insect joke? She said, "Oh stop it, these jokes really bug me."
37. What happened when grandma visited the dentist? She came home and said, "I didn't like him at first, but I wasn't mean to him because I know he has fillings."
38. Why do seagulls only fly over the sea, grandmother? If they fly over bays, they will be called bay-gal.
39. What is the similarity between a grandmother's dentures and stars? Both come out at night.
40. What did grandma have to say when asked about the process of making pickles from cucumbers? She said they go through a jarring experience.
41. Why did the grandmother throw the watch out of the window? She wanted to see time fly.
Birthday Jokes For Grandma
Crack these party jokes at your grandmother's upcoming birthday and steal the show. These granny jokes will get you laughing on the floor.
42. What did grandma say about the rooftop party? It was not the best, but it is up there.
43. What happened when the clown sang a birthday song for grandma? She appreciated the sweet jester.
44. What happened at the costume party? We dressed up as cashews, and grandma thought we were nuts.
45. What happens when you decide not to eat grandma's dinner but get packed food? The next day grandma gets angry because her whole plan got foiled.
46. What did grandma say about her son on her birthday? He worked as a banker, but soon enough he lost interest.
47. Why did grandma buy so many candles from the sale? It was a big blow out.
Puns And Grandma One-Liners
Puns inspired by grandma humor will get you cracking. Here we have compiled a list of one-liners and puns.
48. My grandma still can't believe my brother got fired from the calendar manufacturing unit. All he did was take a day off.
49. I suggested that my grandmother throw a space-themed party. She's asked me to plan-et.
50. My grandmother asked me about my long-distance relationship. I told her, so far, so good.
51. I asked my grandmother how Rome was divided into two parts. She said with a pair of Ceasars.
52. My grandmother retired from the job of a Math teacher. She is figuring out the aftermath.
53. I accidentally dropped a soda can on my grandmother's head. Thank god it was a soft drink.
54. My grandma asked me to find her wristwatch, but I did not get the time.
55. My grandmother is not a big fan of velcro. She says it is a big rip-off.
56. My grandmother offered me a melon for my evening snack. I was feeling melon-cholic.
57. While cleaning the room, one book fell on my grandmother. She has her-shelf to blame.
58. One fine day, I asked my grandmother about a mechanic. She gave me his number and said he is highly wreck'a'mended.
59. One day I sang a song about the tortilla guy to my grandma. Actually, it was more of a rap.
60. Before our grandma died, her last words were, "Don't keep the funeral too early; I am not a mourning person."
Funny Grandma Puns
These puns will come in handy to show off your wits next to the family meal. Here is one list of great grandmother inspired puns.
61. Grandma got some wheels for her rocking chair. She wanted to rock and roll.
62. My brother was feeling shy while singing karaoke in front of the whole family. Grandma said, "Don't be shy, just duet."
63. My sister put our grandma on speed dial. I guess now we can call her Insta- gran.
64. Our 90-year-old grandmother still does not need any glasses. She drinks directly from the jug.
65. My father told my grandmother every day that she needs a new hearing aid, but she would not listen.
66. Grandma accidentally spilled some milk on the rug while making some milkshakes. It was a pour decision.
67. My grandmother was a Math teacher. We were discussing infinity the other day, and it kept going on forever.
68. I was working on a D.I.Y project in which I was making a belt out of watch straps. My grandmother said, "It's a waist of time."
69. My grandmother suggested that I become an electrician when I grow up because the job requirement is shocking.
70. Grandma just returned from an ophthalmologist. He said there's nothing to worry about, she still has a great vision, and that is truly spec-tacular at this age.
71. My grandma loves Rihanna's song about forgetful grans. She always sings along and says, "oh Nana, what's my name?"
72. When Zoomers tell their mom that grandma called, they say, "Boomerang."
Here at Kidadl, we have carefully created lots of great family-friendly jokes and puns for everyone to enjoy! If you liked our suggestions for 70 Grandma Jokes, then why not take a look at apple puns or pie jokes.
Source: https://kidadl.com/funnies/puns/grandma-jokes-and-puns-that-will-get-the-whole-family-laughing
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